Lee's Funnies
The Pillsbury Doughboy ... Dead at 71
Veteran Pillsbury spokesman, The Pillsbury Doughboy, died yesterday of
a severe yeast infection and complications from repeated pokes to the
belly. He was 71.
Doughboy was buried in a slightly greased coffin. Dozens of
celebrities turned out, including Mrs. Butterworth, the California
Raisins, Hungry Jack, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, Captain
Crunch and many others. The graveside was piled high with flours as
longtime friend, Aunt Jemima, delivered the eulogy, describing
Doughboy as a man who "never knew how much he was kneaded."
Doughboy rose quickly in show business but his later life was filled
with many turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie,
wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Still, even as a
crusty old man, he was a roll model for millions.
Doughboy is survived by his second wife, Play Dough. They have two
children and one in the oven. The funeral was held at 3:50 for about
20 minutes.
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