Lee's Funnies

                                                     

                      Law As It Should Be

One evening after attending the theater, two gentlemen were 
walking down the avenue when one observed a rather well 
dressed and attractive lady walking just ahead of them. 

One of them turned to the other and remarked, "I'd give 
$50.00 to spend the night with that woman." 

To their surprise, the young lady overhead the remark and 
turning around she said, "I'll take you up on that." She had 
a neat appearance and a pleasant voice, so after bidding his 
companion goodnight, the man accompanied the lady to her 
apartment where they immediately went to bed.

The following morning the man presented her with $25.00 as 
he prepared to leave. She demanded the rest of the money 
stating that, "if you don't give me the $25.00, I'll sue for 
it." 

He laughed, saying, "I'd like to see you get it on these 
grounds."

The next morning he was surprised to receive a summons 
ordering his presence in court as a defendant in a lawsuit. 
He hurried to his lawyer and explained the details of the 
case. His lawyer said, "She can't possibly get a judgement 
against you on such grounds, but it will be interesting to 
see how her case will be presented."

After the usual preliminaries, the lady's lawyer addressed 
the court as follows:

"Your Honor, my client, this lady, is the owner of a piece 
of property, a garden spot. Surrounded by a profuse growth 
of shrubbery, which property she agreed to rent to the 
defendant for a specified length of time for the sum of 
$50.00. The defendant took possession of the property, used 
it extensively for the purpose for which it was rented, but 
upon evacuating the premises he paid only $25.00, one half 
of the amount of rent agreed upon. The rent was not 
excessive since it is restricted property and we ask that a 
judgement be granted against the defendant to assure the 
balance."

The defendant's lawyer was impressed and amazed at the way 
his opponent has presented his case. His defense, therefore, 
was somewhat altered from the way he originally planned it.

"Your honor," he said, "my client agrees that the young lady 
has a fine piece of property, that he did rent such a 
property for a time and a degree of pleasure was derived 
from the transaction. However, my client found a well on the 
property, around which he placed his own stones, sunk a 
shaft and erected a pump, all labor being personally 
performed by him. We claim these improvements to the 
property were sufficient to offset the unpaid balance, and 
that the plaintiff was adequately compensated for the rental 
of said property. We, therefore, ask that judgement not be 
granted."

The young lady's lawyer comeback was thus, "Your honor, my 
client agrees that the defendant did find a well on her 
property and that he did make the improvements such as my 
opponent described. However, had the defendant not known the 
well existed, he would never have rented the property. Also, 
upon evacuating the premises, the defendant removed the 
stones, pulled out the shaft and took the pump with him. In 
so doing, he not only dragged his equipment through the 
shrubbery, but also left the hole much bigger than it was 
prior to his occupancy, making it easily accessible to 
little children. We, therefore, ask that the judgement be 
granted."

And she got it.


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