Lee's Funnies

                                                     

Teaching Math Through The Years

Teaching Math in 1950:

A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of 
production is 4/5 of the price. What is his profit?

Teaching Math in 1960:

A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of 
production is 4/5 of the price, or $80. What is his profit?

Teaching Math in 1970:

A logger exchanges a set "L" of lumber for a set "M" of 
money. The cardinality of set "M" is 100. Each element is 
worth one dollar. The set "C", the cost of production 
contains 20 fewer points than set "M". What is the 
cardinality of the set "P" of profits?

Teaching Math in 1980:

A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of 
production is $80 and his profit is $20. Your assignment: 
Underline the number 20.

Teaching Math in 1990:

By cutting down beautiful forest trees, the logger makes 
$20. What do you think of this way of making a living? Topic 
for class participation after answering the question: How 
did the forest birds and squirrels feel as the logger cut 
down the trees? There are no wrong answers.

Teaching Math in 1996:

By laying off 402 of its loggers, a company improves its 
stock price from $80 to $100. How much capital gain per 
share does the CEO make by exercising his stock options at 
$80. Assume capital gains are no longer taxed, because this 
encourages investment.

Teaching Math in 1997:

A company outsources all of its loggers. They save on 
benefits and when demand for their product is down the 
logging work force can easily be cut back. The average 
logger employed by the company earned $50,000, had 3 weeks 
vacation, received a nice retirement plan and medical 
insurance.  The contracted logger charges $50 an hour. Was 
outsourcing a good move?

Teaching Math in 1998:

A logging company exports its wood-finishing jobs to its 
Indonesian subsidiary and lays off the corresponding half of 
its US workers (the higher-paid half). It clear-cuts 95% of 
the forest, leaving the rest for the spotted owl, and lays 
off all its remaining US workers. It tells the workers that 
the spotted owl is responsible for the absence of fellable 
trees and lobbies Congress for  exemption from the 
Endangered Species Act. Congress instead exempts the company 
from all federal regulation. What is the return on 
investment of the lobbying?

Teaching Math in 1998 (alternate version): 

A laid-off logger with four kids at home and a ridiculous 
alimony from his first failed marriage comes into the 
logging company corporate offices and goes postal, mowing 
down 16 executives and a couple of secretaries, and gets 
lucky when he nails a politician on the premises collecting 
his kickback. Was out-sourcing the loggers a good move for 
the company?

Teaching Math in 1999

A laid-off logger serving time in Folsom for blowing away 
several people is being trained as a COBOL programmer in 
order to work on Y2K projects. What is the probability that 
the automatic cell doors will open on their own as of 00:01, 
01/01/00?

Go ahead, make my millennium.


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