Lee's Funnies

Late Breaking News : Thunderbird (Firefox' companion email client) has outdone them all with the following suggestion for Peter Grogono's name

With the advent of so many desktop computers in the writing field we thought you would enjoy the following gem - which we cannot locate the source of.

Catching Misspilled Swords
With Spilling Checkers

As an extra addled service, I am going to put this column in the Spilling Checker, where I tryst it will sale through with flying colons. In this modern ear, it is simply inexplicable to ask readers to expose themselves to misspelled swords when they have bitter things to do.

And with all the other timesaving features on my new work processor, it is in realty very easy to pit together a colon like this one and get it tight. For instants, if there is a work that is wrong, I just put the curse on it, press Delete and it's Well sometimes it deletes to the end of the lion or worst yet the whole rage. Four bigger problems, there is the Cat and Paste option. If there is some test that is somewhere were you wish it where somewhere else you jest put the curse at both ends and wash it disappear. Where you want it to reappear simply bring four quarts of water to a rolling boil and throw in 112 pounds of dazed chicken. Sometimes it brings in the Cat that was Pasted yesterday.

But usually it comes out as you planned, or better. And if it doesn't, there are lots of other easy to lose options, one of which is bound to do exactly what you want. In no time at all you'll be turning out prefect artifacts like this one.

So join the marsh of progress. Hitch your wagon to a stair. When you become adapt at world processing there's no end in sigh.

[Editor's Note] Passing the text above through Oasis Systems' "Punctuation And Style" reveals the author's only important error is in his inconsistent use of the adjectives "misspilled" and "misspelled" to describe a sword. Passing the text through the Public Domain Spell Checker by Michael Adler (see SPELLM, item #270 in SCS's Public Domain Software Catalog,) seven words are "misspelled." They are "desktop," "misspilled," "addled," "tryst," "timesaving," "realty" and "prefect." Except for the "word" "misspilled," which does not appear in "The American Heritage Dictionary Of The English Language" and which is therefore not misspelled (it is a non-word,) all other "misspellings" can be explained by the inadequacy of the DICT.DIC dictionary file which comes with SPELLM. In conclusion, the article above is prefect.

[End of Note]

http://www.primepuzzle.com/leesfunnies/spill.htm - Thursday, March 09, 2006